- Him: -shows me a big oversized bowl I like-
- Me: -nods-
- Him: -walks away-
- Him: -comes back-
- Him: So how much do I fill it with cereal? Like...3/4ths?
- Me: I don't know, I never measure it! Like..this much...
- Me: -holds my forefinger and thumb about an inch apart-
- Me: About that much from the top.
- Him -blankly stares- Uuuhhhhh, ok.
- Me: -smirks-
- Him: -pouring cereal- How much milk?
- Me: -waits until he can see me to respond because he's, ya know, deaf-
- Me: Okay, here's how you do this. Pour the milk all over the top and then keep pouring until the milk makes the cereal rise.
- Him: Ooook...
- Me: BUT DONT LET THE CEREAL REALLY RISE! YOU HAVE TO STOP POURING THE MILKS AS SOON AS THE CEREAL MOVES!
- Him: Okay -walks away kind of really unsure-
- Him: -comes back, hands bowl over-
- Me: -test the milk to cereal ratio-
- Me: omg yes this is perf
- Him: Happy Anniversary!
That's Life.
I'm trying to explain to my deaf husband how to make the perfect bowl of cereal (I just typed serreal).
140,963 notes / reblog / 2 months ago
I mask my crippling self-esteem issues with bad puns and movie references
and singing songs from phrases that you say.
(via vegetable)
i literally dont understand the point of making a bed
Me either. I never have.
My mind feels messy if my bed isn’t made. If I look in my room and the sheets and blankets and pillows are just scattered everywhere, I feel uneasy. I just feel better, at ease, if my bed is made. It’s calming.
(Source: mcsnuggie)
Hey, new followers!
Not sure how you found me. Or if you’ll stick around. But thanks!!
I haven’t update tumblr much and not sure how often I will, but big things are sort of kind of happening. So stay tuned. I think you’ll be happy (eventually) that you did. :]
Thanks. :]
So I’m totally not DTFTU* and I don’t want to jinx things. But I totally just wrote, edited, re-edited, and deleted then re-wrote and -edited the intro to my book.
*Down To Fuck Things Up
Not gonna lie. I’m pretty disappointed that basically everyone is not coming to Audrey’s GOLDEN birthday party. And everyone is asking if we’ll reschedule it.
I sometimes get really empowered to change my life/situation.
Then I remember I’m poor and that I like food too much.
- Me: -taking a nap-
- Husband: Hey, are you going to wake up?
- Me: Mmm.
- Husband: I barely get to see you as it is!
- Me: You can see me...
- Husband: .....
- Me: You can stand there and watch me sleep...
- Me: and be like Edward Cullen
- Me: I'll throw glitter on you.
- Husband: No.
- Husband: I'd rather be like Christian Grey.
- Me: Good luck with that.
- Husband: Why are you touching yourself?
- Me: Because my vagina has been cooped up all day.
- Husband: ....
- Me: It wants to be free!
- Husband: Like Dobby!!
- Me: My vagina is a free vagina!!!
What am I supposed to do? Do I fight for what I believe in? Shouldn’t I fight so that I’m not getting walked all over? But aren’t you also supposed to stop and listen to the other person? Aren’t you supposed to think before you speak? How are you supposed to tell what is worth the argument? What is worth the avoidance and the disgruntled looks?
